Huffington Post - An Iowa man wanted for robbery appears to have taken to Facebook to contest the charges against him.
Andrew Bolden, 31, is wanted for allegedly stealing $850 in electronics from Sears on April 26. Security cameras filmed a man who police later identified as Bolden grabbing goods and dashing for the door, KCCI reports. A loss prevention officer said Bolden assaulted him as he fled.
Des Moines police posted a Facebook appeal for help finding Bolden on April 28.
On May 8, a Facebook user named Andrew Slikk Bolden commented on the post, contesting the police's version of events. This sparked an exchange between the user and the police department's Facebook account:
Bolden has plenty to say, “now I strive to be public enemy #1….yup, I got nothing to lose but the world to gain…how dangerous am I? by the way the police forgot to warn the public that i’m a martial arts expert and my iq is quite on the high end, yall ready!!!???”
A warrant for Bolden's arrest has been issued, but so far, police haven't been able to find him. He has continued to taunt police on social media. Police believe the suspect is still in Des Moines.
“He's taunting us a little bit and that's fine,” Des Moines Police Sgt. Jason Halifax told WHO-TV. "We certainly feel that Facebook is a useful tool for us in crime solving."
Bolden appeared to remain at large Tuesday. He continues to taunt police with posts to his own Facebook profile, which is public:
"tell ya what cops, heres ya chance. im on the north side. of course i have a phone with a different states area code. im tired of des moines so im going to south dakota to visit the homegirl becky on the reservation. gulfport missisippi after that then of course its texas houston if ya need more hints, then to la where i can c walk in ya face. i work as security at a club here n i use my name just a lil switched up. try drew boldin. if ya cant get me within a week then u should retire as a cop or go catch a real criminal. bye pigs""
Bolden is described as 6 feet 3 inches tall and 215 pounds. Des Moines police are asking anyone who knows his whereabouts to contact Polk County Crimestoppers at (515) 223-1400.
It's funny, cus if you click the link to the story (and video), you'll see that immediately following the main post is a mugshot gallery of "Dumb Criminals", as if to somehow suggest a link between Andrew "Slikk" Bolden and these peasants of crime. Uh, hey HuffPo, last time I checked this guy ain't in custody yet, and it doesn't look to me like it's happening any time soon, so why don't you hold off on labeling him an idiot until the Des Moines Police prove they can actually nab this guy.
You know how the Joker said that Gotham deserved a better class of criminal, and that he was gonna give it to them... like in the video below?
Well maybe I'm jumping the gun here (totally not), but I think old Slikk is taking the same approach to the crime game in Des Moines. Not that it's that hard to elevate the crime game in Iowa, I mean if you're not committing a horse sex crime or something then you're already doing it bigger than most, but still, this bravado is something that any city should hope for in it's criminals. The guy steals less than a grand worth of stuff and now has the entire state Police force scratching their head and blindly* chasing him all over the place.
The best way to win is to make your opponent play YOUR game, and this is just another classic example. Whether they know it or not, Slikk has the DMPD (sounds like a drug) wrapped around his finger, playing his terrifying game of anarchy and destruction. Oh sorry, did he mention he's a martial arts expert and has a pretty damn high IQ? And with literary references like Frankenstein coming from nowhere, it's hard not to believe him.
So watch yourselves, Huffington Post. This may just look like another Dumb Criminal story to you guys, but I see the bigger picture here, and before you know it, the whole of Des Moines will be hinging on Slikk's next move, just hoping that they aren't a pawn in his master plan to wipe out the entire electronics department of every major store in the city (so like the two Wal-Mart's and one Target that just opened in Iowa... there's been rumors that Best Buy may make it's way there sometime this decade, though, so look out).
* Except not so blindly cus he literally told you exactly where he's going to be and who he's going to be with (Homegirl Becky must be like, "shit man, why you bringin me in to this?") for the next week....