Kid's Dreams Crumble When Bounce House Flies Away With Nobody In It

HuffPo - A bounce house crashed into a power line after it was swept up into the sky from a birthday party in western New York. Fortunately, no children were in the inflatable attraction when it became unhinged on Saturday, WABC reports.

“Oh my god, the bounce house,” a lady is heard screaming in video shared on Twitter by the Niagara County Fire Wire.  Sparks fly when the bounce house collides with the electrical tower, the footage shows.

“Ohhhh, shit!” she exclaims on impact.

A professional crew later removed the giant deflated toy from the tower, according to WABC. A common summer attraction, bounce houses have been known to sometimes turn dangerous. In 2014, two boys were seriously injured when a bounce house blew away in South Glens Falls, New York.

"Fortunately no children were in the inflatable attraction"? Uh, hey ding dong, you tellin me you wouldn't want to fly in a bounce house? There's not many things that you can rely on in this crazy world but I'll tell you one thing you can always trust: bounce houses are never not fun. I don't care if you're in the target demographic (age 6-12) or comfortably out of it (me), bounce houses are a good time 10 out of 10 times. You know how you get that number up to 11 out of 10? Make them fly. 

Sure, the whole ending up in a power line thing was not the most desired finale, but aren't those houses made of rubber? And doesn't rubber absorb electricity? They always say that if you stand on rubber you can't get electrocuted no matter what, they ALWAYS say that. So basically science proves that had there been a little child in that thing the only wound they would have suffered is the hole left in their heart knowing they'd never have an experience like that again. I bet if we go track down those two boys from South Glens Falls and ask them if the injuries were worth the trip they had they look you dead in the eye and say "Yes. Now get the fuck out of my house."  You see that anger? Byproduct of knowing they've hit their peak experience in life. 

But if there is one thing we can be happy about after this story it's that I now will be starting the Flying Bounce Houses Kickstarter. We don't need much, probably a good 100 or so bounce houses to start and some brave pioneers, cus I don't think we're going to be able to raise enough to get these things any semblance of a navigation system. But isn't that sort of the point? Hop in the bounce house, lose yourself in the moment and let the winds of opportunity take you away. Literally. We will of course have a waiver claiming no responsibility for your death, but should you die we do guarantee a singing telegram delivered to your family's home to gently break the news to them. Flying Bounce Houses - Never Come Down (working tag line).